To the gay male community of Vancouver:
I'm sorry I called you all shallow bitches for ignoring me all these years. 'Grotesque', 'repulsive, 'disgusting' and all those other names guys at PumpJack have called me, you're right, and then some.
Meanwhile, the quest goes on for a new official portrait to replace the one you see at the top left-hand corner of this page. As you can tell, I've just had a chance to go through the first batch of nearly 100, and none of them are even a little bit suitable, on account of my extreme hideosity.
Well, at least there's a bright side; this should help put an end to all the endless whining I do about being single...
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Monday, March 12, 2007
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6 comments:
Perhaps you just need an enema and a betchslap?
Paging Dr. Kelly. Paging Dr. Kelly. Recto-cranial insertion emergency!
Rather than suffering an almost non-stop crisis of confidence over the fact that I'm not good-looking enough, I can have full confidence in the fact that I am ugly, and conduct myself and my life accordingly.
Mainstream gay male culture has very narrow definitions of beauty. Each of us can choose to accept and internalize those definitions or reject them and embrace the life that the Goddess has given us to live.
I think that the gay men who are born with the kind of face, body and personality that are celebrated by those people are cursed. They will be seduced and distracted from doing anything worthwhile with their lives until it's too late.
The greatest gift the Goddess gave me was to be rejected by the superficial, vain, cruel, stupid, ignorant and foolish gay men who dance, drink, drug and fuck their way through their lives until they are nothing more than withered husks. In the end, those men are rejected by the very gay culture that first embraced then devoured them.
I pity them in their empty, meaningless lives. If things like PumpJack are the best that gay male culture can come up with, then they deserve to be discriminated against and I am quite happy to not be a part of the scene.
The only thing that has ever made me happy was helping others and pursuing the things that I love. Having a life partner did not make me happy. I found a partner because I was happy.
That would be fine if it was just some guys doing it. In fact, it is all gay men who are rude to me. Not just barflies. Professional types too. The guys at PumpJack are not pretty men.
>>>all gay men who are rude to me.
I have never been rude to you. And according to my ex, I am as gay as they get. d;-)
You are a handsome and articulate man. Why let some drunk's remarks guide your perception of who you are? Define your own existence.
Unfortunately, Don, you don't live in Vancouver.
Since I've been blogging I've gotten some very warm compliments about my appearance from guys, from all over the place, just not from here.
Remember, it was having to take photos that prompted this. Either I am not photogenic or I am nervous when there's a camera near, but whatever it is, the guy in those pictures is not the one in my mirror.
Perhaps this is what the guys in Vancouver are responding to. A camera shutter is open for 1/25th of a second, which I would consider a lingering glance from a guy in this city.
And once again, this harsh treatment comes from all kinds of gay men: young and old, professionals, otherwise nice guys.
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