Sunday, August 03, 2008

What Pride Day Means To Me

Unlike in previous years, when I've wittered on about "community" and "human rights" in this space, today I've decided to discard the pretense and come clean; when it comes to Pride Day, although I enjoy my annual glimpse at oodles of boobies and the opportunity to move among drag queens in the daylight, the only thing I really care about seeing is hot homos. The rest of the year, of course, I am specifically forbidden access to them, and have to make do instead with a potent combination of porno, straight guys, and imagination. Here then are - in my own humble opinion - the ten hottest guys at Vancouver's Pride Day this year (some of whom, I admit, may be straight). ~ MSM

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Number Ten: This is J, the Trojan model I voted for to be Mr. Trojan via text message at the fair following the parade. I included him because - hello? can you not see him? - but I decided that, in keeping with my politics, I'd have to put him last - if only because he's obviously spent every day of his life basking in the admiration of others, and missing out on the greater acclaim of a rinky-dink blog like this one won't mean bupkiss to him.


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Number Nine: A beefy guy with a baby? How am I supposed to resist that? I'm ostensibly only human, after all. Not even the fact that he's overtly Christian is a turnoff - that's some powerful cute there.


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Number Eight: As usual, the police were at the parade, trying to trick convince gays into joining the police force, where they will then be given the most dangerous assignments and denied backup; this is a game (also played by security guards) called "Smear The Queer" popularized by the LAPD in the 1980s with Mitchell Grobeson. My only hope is that, despite being given bait like this, gay men resist joining the police force en masse; or, if they do fall for the bullshit line that the police care whether gay men live or die, may I suggest turning the tables and playing a similar game entitled "Get The Het". I trust you boys will be able to figure out how to play...


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Number Seven: I make no apologies for appreciating the male body as it's supposed to look, before sedentary jobs and additive-laden foods render it a shapeless, weakened mass not unlike my own. I occasionally find myself wondering what my life would have been like if I'd been born attractive - more like daydreaming, really - but in recent years don't have the energy to waste on envy, preferring simple admiration instead.


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Number Six: Even in a shirt, this is clearly a tidy little bundle of cuteness; I included him despite an abundance of same simply because of his haircut, which rendered him a) the dead spit of the guys I used to crush on in high school, and b) the farthest thing from a twink clone I saw all day, which probably means he's straight. Still...


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Number Five: Gifted cartoonist and quintessential artist John Crossen has long been one of my favourite people, an assessment just about everybody he's ever met will share with me. Only it's not just his mind I admire; in person he puts one in mind of an even humpier, even funnier Dan Butler. It was great running into him following the parade, and smoking a J in the shade of a tree with English Bay on one side and about 50,000 of Vancouver's finest people on the other.


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Number Four: This year's living Parade Marshall (his co-marshal was the late author Jane Rule) was Sahran Abeysundara, a spicy treat from Sri Lanka, who made an impassioned plea to the assembled throng on behalf of gays on the Subcontinent, who live with far less freedom than do their counterparts in the West.


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Number Three: Being painted saffron gives this fuzzy little morsel an exotic flavour, visually at least.


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Number Two: Vancouver's next mayor is going to be Gregor Robertson, a charismatic entrepreneur and former MLA whose advocacy on behalf of affordable rental housing for the city's working poor has gotten him plenty of press, not to mention earning him nearly as much respect from the Pop Culture Institute as his matinee idol looks and lean frame. Given the ease with which he rollerbladed the entire route, pressing the flesh the entire time, running for mayor should prove a dawdle by comparison.


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Number One: Much as I expected, despite the masses of flesh and beautiful faces on display, by far the hottest guy at Vancouver's Pride Day this year (as much for his flesh and his face as his fire) was human rights worker and Facebook heart-throb Luke LaRue, whose radiant soul is on constant display thanks to an ever-present smile. So much so, in fact, that even though this photo was taken at the same f-stop as the others, it still seems over-exposed, and thus I had to struggle to render an image from it, not least of all because my glasses kept fogging up.
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6 comments:

Y | O | Y said...

Okay, I vote for John Crossen. He is my physical ideal.

I met Mitch Grobeson at a fundraiser a long time ago and made a half-hearted attempt to get him in the sack with no success. He is best friends with a friend of mine.

Seumas Gagne said...

Yay! Thanks for the fabulous post on Pride Day 2008!

TankMontreal said...

It's good to see a bit of you reflected here and not just pop culture.

michael sean morris said...

The funny thing is, I think the entire blog has me reflected in it - my perspective, biases, the whole lot; I'm just not trying to build a cult of personality around myself like Joe.My.God, however.

Seumas Gagne said...

You would kill to have a cult of personality. Admit it. Constantly looking for ways to get more readers and comments? What do you call that?

michael sean morris said...

I want readers and commenters here because of the quality of my content, not because I adopted a special needs cat that I then go on and on about until even an uncynical observer might wonder aloud that the only reason I did it was to get positive comments. As a completely hypothetical "for instance"...

If that means I must keep my good deeds to myself (regardless of the detrimental effect such non-disclosure might cause to my reputation) then so be it.