Sunday, September 09, 2007

What Is The Deal With Adam Sandler?


I know today is his birthday and all, so I'll go easy on him. But seriously, what is the deal with Adam Sandler?

It turns out the amount of weed I would have to smoke in order to make him funny may, in fact, be the fabled fatal dose of marijuana American government scientists have been trying to discover since the drug was outlawed in the 1920s.

Wait a minute... What were we talking about?

As you can see, even the amount of medication I needed to do the research for this piece has left me with desert mouth and wicked munchies. These are all technical terms...

Okay, focus. Adam Sandler. Right.

I'm serious; what is his deal? Well, let's see. His comedy comes from anger, which is okay, since when not performing he usually comes off as having the personality of a potato. At least he has a suitable outlet for his anger. Still, is one less serial killer really worth having to watch all those terrible movies he makes?

Of course it is; at least at the Cineplex you can choose not to be raped and left for dead.

At the Pop Culture Institute, a crack team of researchers (as opposed to a team of researchers on crack) are looking into this very matter as we speak, and will be issuing reports from time to time; so at least, like the end of every Adam Sandler movie, you have something to look forward to.
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

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