Thursday, January 13, 2011

Gratuitous Brunette: Orlando Bloom

Orlando_BloomIt was several years ago now that Kingdom of Heaven, Sir Ridley Scott's epic film about the Crusades, found its way into the collection of the Pop Culture Institute; when the film was released in 2005, certain critics were heard to bemoan the sad state of the action film when someone like Orlando Bloom could be one of the genre's biggest stars.

It's too bad, really, that an addiction to bitch pills seems to be a prerequisite for becoming a movie critic...

The notion of a Stallone or a Schwarzeneggar portraying Legolas (for instance) is worse than laughable, it's nausea-inducing; alas, such is collective 'mind' of the criticocracy that progress and innovation are anathema to them, except in retrospect.

On this, his 34th birthday, just let me say that if there were more action films starring actors like Orlando Bloom - who can at least act - I might watch more of them myself. That way, even if the script is bad - a pretty good bet with most action films - at least there's someone to look at onscreen whose neck isn't wider than his head, and whose head is filled with more than sets and reps...
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