BC Ferries: Cruising The Straits

Well, this is the thanks I get for going off half-cocked.

It turns out my big day trip to Nanaimo was a flop, so rather than dwell on the failure of it, I have chosen to look upon it as a) a learning experience, b) a fact-finding mission, and c) an excuse to have a lovely boat ride and take a lot of pretty pictures.

In fact, I took enough pictures to do three or four photo essays.

First, I should explain: the title isn't mine.

There is a legend (which many claim is true, which is the way it is with legends) that either in the 70s or in the 80s (legends not being known for their accuracy) BC Ferries commissioned that very slogan and either was about to or had already rolled out their ad campaign based around it, when someone explained to them what it meant.

Ever since, certain muck-raking bitches (myself proudly included), have refused to let the legend die. I would love to come into possession of some piece of proof that the story was true, and so I am making my wish upon the Internet, which has done so much for me thus far.

Maybe some day the evidence I seek will surface.



British Columbia's waters are very much working waters: the Port of Vancouver does a massive amount of the Nation's business, car and passenger ferries chug between the mainland and dozens of offshore islands (the largest of which is Vancouver Island) and fishing boats, whale-watching and other eco-tours, cruise ships, and pleasure craft make up the rest.

On this day I took the ferry from Horseshoe Bay, on the mainland, to Departure Bay in Nanaimo, which is on Vancouver Island. It sailed at 3 PM, arrived at 4:40, at which time I turned around and came back on the 5 PM, returning at 6:37 - three minutes early! It cost $11.50 to go, and $5.95 to return, plus $4.50 for bus fare there and back - $21.95 for a nice day out.



The ferries themselves can be quite large, but they are dwarfed by the sheer immensity of the Coast Mountains. The arrival and departure provide the best scenery (if you can find a spot at the rail between photographers) mainly because the boats are moving more slowly, but also because of the stretch of open water in the middle of the journey.

This is more pronounced on the southern route from Tswassen to Saanich/Victoria.

It can be furiously windy, too, as it was this day. As warm as it was on land, I was wishing I'd worn long pants once I was on the boat. Fortunately there are many places to go to warm up, and the amenities on the boats are ample.



Leaving Horseshoe Bay, the ferry gets a pretty spectacular view of Vancouver between the mainland (on the left) and Bowen Island (on the right). I was unprepared for this, as it had been 25 years since I'd last taken the trip. Also, 25 years ago, the view would not have looked quite like this. Our little city has certainly done some growing up!



Mid-water can be the most relaxing. The passage itself is a symphony of blue and grey tones at the best of times. This combined with the sea air and the gentle rocking motion is almost worth the fare itself. Since I have no time or money with which to travel, I was looking for an experience that would feel like travel, and I got it, right down to the relief at finally being home.



Approaching Nanaimo the spiny back of Vancouver Island looms up; some of these mountains are visible from Vancouver's English Bay (on very clear days). Though it is thought of as something of a backwater populated by yokels, this is a typically urban myth. Most of the people on Vancouver Island and the Gulf Islands are refugees from the city.

Besides which, there are plenty of rednecks and yokels living right here in the city. I know this because, in my line of work, I either deal with them or work with them regularly.



I don't know anyone who's moved offshore, so I have no pied-a-terre on the Sunshine Coast as of yet. But some day, maybe... I keep telling myself that I'll one day rent a kayak and travel around these islands a little more intimately. I may yet do that as well.



I was surprised to see so much snow cover so late in the season. Though it's picturesque, it spells potential disaster if a heat wave hits, which has been known to happen in May. Some of the snow cover is glacial, though, in which case, I'd prefer it if it stayed right where it is.



I decided to end on a poignantly arty shot of a fishing boat sailing off into the sunset. I tweaked it a little, casting a golden hue over what was originally almost black and white. The BC fishery could use a little golden glow right now seeing as it, like all fisheries, is threatened.

I will get the trip to Nanaimo I originally planned, only next time I'll put a little more preparation into it. In the meantime I hope the pictures show that the day wasn't a total wash.
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HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

In answer to alla y'all who seem to think that I was hatched, or came from spores (you know who you are), I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce you to my mother, Penny.

In addition to being a community leader in Kelowna, serving as President of the Ladies Auxiliary of the Royal Canadian Legion there on several occasions, she is also personally involved in caring for the elderly in a palliative setting. She has always been a fervent animal welfare activist, having rescued the 10 cats which live with her, and dozens more from a thoughtless neighbour whose two became thirty or forty recently.

Though I have often cited my grandmother - her mother - as the greatest influence on my life, I would not be who I am without my mother's guidance. Her mistakes, as well as her successes, gave both my life and my ambitions their focus and drive. When I was younger I fought with her (often quite bitterly) and through it all she never once lost her cool, even though I was a real jerk. I guess I was testing her unconditional love. She passed that test, though, as that is the only way she knows how to love.

I can see now that even her mistakes were well-meaning, that I as a teenager turned her protection into smothering and her concern into censure. There were a few years there in which it was anybody's guess whether I would survive myself; I have no doubt I wouldn't have if it hadn't have been for her.

Mother's Day, then, is a very special one for me and always has been. In my heart, every day is Mother's Day.
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WTF: Purex Billboard, W. 8th & Ash

Normally, I am so inured to advertising that I can pretty well ignore it. Hell, I have to; I'm so suggestible I'll be in line at the Shopper's Drug Mart with the box of maxi-pads even before I realise what I'm doing. Nevertheless, my photographer's eye snagged on this ingenious bit of business one day recently when I was already late for work.

So out came the camera, followed by this shot, which was itself followed by several blocks of speedwalking to make up for lost time. In fact, I was so worried I'd be late for work, I could have used some Purex.

Hmm...
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Isn't It Funny?

Last week at lunch I was asking a great friend of this blog if, in his opinion, there was anything I could be posting about here that I haven't been. He said he couldn't think of anything. Personally, I think he was just being nice, because I thought of a couple things myself without hardly any effort.

The first of these: I mentioned to him that I'd often come across a birthday in my research that I was reluctant to headline as "Happy Birthday" since the person in question was dead. As I was wondering aloud how I might include them anyway I suggested posting them as "In Memoriam". Bang! An idea is born.

This was not the first time I've answered my own question; Hell, it wasn't even the first time last week.

Another thing that interests me that I don't blog about is movies, especially those from the 1930s. The post from a couple of days about "Thirty Day Princess" felt so good to write (and is just the sort of thing one might Google) that I've decided to do more of these.

A lot of blogs (such as Y|O|Y) cover new shows, and it's these posts which drive alot of traffic to their sites. Well, I'm not able to blog about new shows, due to my hectic and changeable work schedule, but I can go the other way, and chronicle the obscure, in hopes of luring those of similar taste into my clutches. Er, my, uh... Oh, let's face it, the only word that works is clutches.

Plus, if I can interest someone who isn't a fan, that'll be a bonus.

I just wanted to say thank you for Seumas, for being such a good sounding board, and Gavin as well, for obliquely giving me an idea that may yet elevate me into the next level of the blogosphere.
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If It Makes You Happy...

What a day for babies here at the Pop Culture Institute!

The day started with news of Dezi James and ended with news of Wyatt Steven, who was recently adopted by none other than Sheryl Crow herself.

[S O U R C E]
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Screened: "Thirty Day Princess" (1934)

Any qualms I may have had concerning the picture quality of "Thirty Day Princess" going into it were immediately dispelled as its credits began to roll.

Universal's film restorers are continuing to outdo themselves. This film couldn't have looked as good in its initial theatrical release as it does today on DVD. Despite a couple of obviously missing elements (which are nonetheless well-glossed over) both picture and sound here are peerless. There is a full-range of tones present, making the black-and-white photography look almost creamy.

The story is slight, a bit formulaic, but addresses the Depression (which is rare for a film of that era) and features a sprightly, nuanced performance by Sylvia Sidney and fine work both by Cary Grant and Edward Arnold, as a crusading newspaper editor and a plutocratic banker respectively. There's even a bit of split-screen, in which Nancy Lane and Princess Zizzi (both played by Sidney) get to play a scene together.

I'll never know why Sylvia Sidney wasn't a bigger star (in this film she's billed above the title, and Grant's is the first name below it). Then again, not being a blonde might have something to do with it. Still, from her first picture, 1929's "Thru Different Eyes" to her last film "Mars Attacks" (1996) she never seemed to hurt for work, mainly thanks to television.

Now I can't wait to get to the rest of "Screen Legends Collection: Cary Grant". Up next: "Kiss and Make Up" (1934), co-starring Genevieve Tobin.
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Blog Fodder - A Moment of Gloating

I have just read in Xtra West where BC Bears Society has decided to "hibernate" for awhile, due to declining membership. If I can be permitted a moment to gloat:

In 1999 I tried to join BC Bears Society. My (then-, now ex-) partner and I had just moved here and my social network took a commensurate hit; I was looking for something to join. Vancouver Pride Society and Out On Screen (the queer film festival) had both rejected me despite my sterling credentials for both.

I went to Pride Day that year and afterwards, at the community fair, I spotted the BC Bears table. When I approached it and asked about joining them the skinny guy working there looked me up and down and in the bitchiest, faggiest way told me to come back when I'd gained a hundred pounds.

Well, I must have been three hundred pounds that day, at least a hundred pounds heavier than this guy. The fact that I'd been met with the same attitude everywhere else (only everywhere else I'd been told to lose a hundred pounds, rather than gain it) was not lost on me.

Since I obviously didn't fit into mainstream gay and I wasn't going to be accepted even at the fringes of the community, I withdrew from all gay community activities at that point. Maybe that wasn't the most sensible course of action, but what else could I do? Why would I continue to fight to be included in something that had already rejected me so many times?

I decided that day to focus on those aspects of humanity that I thought might be more appreciative of my efforts, namely the arts and social justice. Within Pandora's Collective and even COPE I have managed to make my contribution to society in more meaningful ways; even if neither has done anything to enhance my sex life, Pandora's Collective has at least introduced me to many fine friends I wouldn't have met if I'd stayed on Davie Street.

I suspect many other men were rejected by BC Bears in a similarly callous manner, probably by this same volunteer, which is likely what led to the declining numbers at their meetings. I can't say I'm not glad to hear it; editorial policy permits me to freely gloat whenever snobs and bigots and any kind of petty tyrant gets their comeuppance.

For those men whose lifeline this community was, I do feel bad, though. May I suggest leaving your ghetto behind and traveling amongst regular people for awhile?

There. I'm done now.
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Welcome Dezi James Cubiche

Leggy "My Name is Earl" stunner Jaime Pressly and her DJ boyfriend (the similarly leggy, similarly stunning) Eric Cubiche welcomed a little bundle today. Dezi James was born in Los Angeles at 7:31 AM local time, and weighed in at 6 pounds 4 ounces. He's named after Desi Arnaz (despite the misspelling) and Pressly's father.
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There's Something About Cary

How an English homosexual named Archie Leach became the quintessentially American ladies man Cary Grant is a greater story than any of those he told on film during his prodigious career.

To the many "stars" whose careers fizzle after a decade or less, the over seventy films he made between 1933 and 1966 ought to serve as a primer on survival in Hollywood. They are romantic comedies, screwballs, dramas, and thrillers, and among them are some of the finest of their type ever made.

At a time when Hollywood's romantic leading men were infected with a bland sameness, Grant was a definite brand apart. In that way he was more akin with Gary Cooper and Humphrey Bogart than Robert Taylor and George Brent.

I just bought a 5-movie box set of his earlier works, into which I am about to dive. Despite being familiar with Grant's oeuvre, not one of these titles was familiar to me. Their leading ladies are, though: Sylvia Sidney, Genevieve Tobin, Myrna Loy, and Joan Bennett. I was a tiny bit reluctant to buy it, as it's not released by a major studio, and films from the early 30s are of a notoriously poor quality due to print degradation.

Ultimately, I don't care; I'll squint through grit if I have to, in order to gain this glimpse into the early career of an enduring Hollywood legend.
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RIP Dwight 'Percy' Wilson

As of today, Canada has one remaining veteran of the First World War.

The second-to-last, Dwight 'Percy' Wilson, died today at Toronto's Sunnybrook Hospital. He was 106.

The remaining Canadian veteran of the conflict - John Babcock - lives in Spokane, Washington.

[S O U R C E]
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Cause Of "Great Gray Malaise" Determined

Cranial examination of michael sean morris, director of the obscure blog Pop Culture Institute has revealed the source of the "great gray malaise" from which he was said to suffer.

"It turns out to be nothing more than existential angst, which exacerbated a pre-existing condition of Irritable Bowel Syndrome," morris said, when reached via email at the Institute's headquarters. "I found myself, night after night, sitting at the computer and wondering why I was doing it: writing, photography, blogging."

It seems spending all that time in your head isn't good for you, and then to spend most of it with your head up your ass only makes matters worse, especially if it irritates your bowel.

"It occurred to me," he continued, "That the most appropriate answer to 'Why?' is 'Why not?' The most successful people in show business are obviously not hindered by such angst. Otherwise there wouldn't be anything on TV. They just continue to churn it out."

Having discovered the source of his ailment, morris said he plans to move ahead on all the projects he'd planned, including an expanded blog, sitcoms, and novels. "Now that I don't always have to stop myself and think 'what's the point' I can continue to clutter the public consciousness with more useless memes and annoying catchphrases. As well as bringing my readers the best of such things from around the world and throughout time."

He concluded: "It's an exciting time."
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Queen and President: Duelling Speeches

On her last night in Washington, Elizabeth II hosted a return banquet at the British Embasssy for the President and First Lady.

To make a toast, Her Majesty rose first:

Mr. President, I wondered whether I should start this toast saying, "When I was here in 1776" -- (laughter and applause.)

Mr. President, it is a real pleasure to welcome you and Mrs. Bush here this evening. Over our six days in the United States, we have much enjoyed the chance to dwell on the history of the relationship between our two countries, as well as celebrating its present strength and vitality. I would like to thank everyone for the warmth and kindness extended to us.

I would also like to take this opportunity, on the day that has seen the formal transfer of power to the devolved Northern Ireland government, to thank you and your predecessors for your contribution to bringing peace to Northern Ireland.

May I ask everyone to rise and drink a toast to President and Mrs. Bush, to the future of our two countries, and the enduring friendship between Britain and the United States.

Mr. President.

(A toast is offered.)

The President then rose to acknowledge the Queen's kind and witty words.

Your Majesty, I can't top that one. (Laughter.)

Your Royal Highness, distinguished guests, thank you so much for a warm welcome. Laura and I appreciate your hospitality. I particularly want to thank Ambassador Manning and Lady Manning for inviting us to your home.

The friendship between the British and American people is one of the oldest and most enduring in history. This friendship has been built on the common ideal of freedom, and forged by our shared sacrifices in freedom's defense.

Your Majesty, I appreciate your visit to our World War II Memorial. I thank you for sharing your perspective last night on how the Atlantic Alliance that emerged from a great conflict has helped lay the foundation for freedom's triumph in Europe and beyond.

Today, British and American troops are following the example set by a previous generation. Troops from our two countries are serving side by side to bring the hope of liberty to regions that have not known it. Together we're supporting young democracies that are taking their first steps on the path to free and peaceful societies.

This morning the world witnessed yet another advance for freedom and peace -- the people of Northern Ireland took control of their future when Catholics and Protestants came together to form a new government that offers the prospect of peace and reconciliation after years of violence and division. In Belfast today, we're seeing once again how democracy and freedom can help heal a wounded world.

Your Majesty, thank you for your words tonight, and for the love and affection you have shown the American people over many years. In this spirit, I offer a toast to Your Majesty, to Your Royal Highness, and to our closest of friends, the British people.

(A toast is offered.)

The Pop Culture Institute offers you its own toast, Your Majesty:

Long may you reign!
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Queen In Space, At Mall

On the Queen's last full day in the US, she visited NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center in Maryland.

While there Her Majesty listened to three astronauts describing their duties onboard the International Space Station.

After leaving Goddard the Queen is expected to lay a wreath at the WWII memorial on the National Mall before returning the favour by hosting the President and First Lady to a banquet at the British Embassy.

The Queen and Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, return to London May 8th.
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A State Dinner Fit For A Queen

130 guests joined the President, First Lady and the royal couple at the White House Monday for the first white-tie affair of the Bush Administration.

The menu featured British cuisine, and the speeches subtly disagreed, and a marvellous time was had by all.

[S O U R C E]
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Queen Arrives At White House

The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh were warmly greeted at the White House Monday by the President and First Lady.



There followed the usual speeches, including a now-famous flub made by the President, a lunch and a garden party.

The royal couple will not be staying in the White House, but rather at nearby Blair House, where guests of state stay.

The six-day visit wraps up this evening, with the Bush Administration's first-ever white-tie dinner. The Queen and Prince Philip fly back to London tomorrow.

[S O U R C E]
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No Comment: When Readers Attack

On a site like Gawker there are so many commenters that they can afford to delete a few every so often. They do this in a way which is designed to not offend the remaining commenters, but nevertheless sends the message to its users about expected modes of behaviour while on the site in a suitably hip and humourous way.

The posts where this occurs usually fall under the grim heading of Commenter Executions; in preparing this piece, a simple search at Gawker yielded 342 examples, making Gawker's Commenter Executions a more-or-less weekly event.

Well, I'm not executing anyone, but I did receive a trio of comments which I will not be moderating. Instead, they will be placed here, where they can be dissected and studied. This is just one of the risks of dealing with me; anything that happens involving me is potential blog fodder. It remains to be seen whether such a policy will ultimately draw more people to me or drive them away. Anyway, "them's the risks", as they say; also, since it's my blog, "nanny nanny poo poo" if you don't like it.

Firstly, this trio of comments were published anonymously. Now, when I started this blog I was anything but adept at managing it, and so I'd had it set up that only other Blogspot members could leave comments. After about the sixth or seventh post, I was informed that this was the case (by another frequent commenter) and I remedied the situation.

The commenter in question (let's call him Mr. X) has been informed of this change of status, but still publishes anonymously, although lately he's at least taken to putting his name in the body of the comment. That, and given the calibre of the comments themselves, is what we in the business call "too little too late".

I realise it's a bit of a hassle to leave a comment, what with the mystery word and all, and I thank all of you who willingly undergo this precautionary step in order to do so. Given the nature of this blog, and the type of subject matter being dealt with, I feel it's my responsibility to protect it and its readers from flamers and haters of all kinds.

I'm sure I will give this practise up once there are so many comments that moderating them cuts into my writing time.

* * *

On the post "Now Showing - Jimmy Carr" Mr. X wrote:

"stodgy brit wit, though i want more american patronizing"

Nothing wrong in that per se but it should be pointed out that Jimmy Carr wasn't just patronising to Americans, but to the British audience as well. Thus the joke. Had Mr. Carr only been patronising towards Americans, I doubt I'd have found it as funny. In fact, it can be argued that Mr. Carr wasn't poking fun at Americans at all, but rather at himself. Wanting "more american patronising", Mr. X comes dangerously close to hater territory. I also disagree with the word "stodgy", but as Mr. X is entitled to his opinion, I won't make any judgement about that.

On "Queen's Address To Virginia Assembly" he wrote:

"that peacock-looking violet-blue and coral red hat is garish, gaudy and god-awful...definitely the ugliest hat ever!"

No word about the speech, just straight to the hat.

Now the hat may be garish and gaudy but as it is an exemplar of the kind of hats the Queen always wears it is hardly exceptional; as for the ugliest hat ever, that would be a hardhat. The second ugliest hat ever is the do-rag Mr. X himself has worn every single day since 1988. The Queen's hats are an admittedly touchy subject with me; here is where the policy "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" comes most fully into play.

His final comment was in response to On This Day in Pop Culture (1931):

"when u do finally fuck off to nyc, don't bother going up there -- too damn crowded with tourists"

Since if I didn't want to go where there are tourists a) I wouldn't travel, b) I wouldn't travel to New York, and c) I definitely wouldn't go to the top of the Empire State Building, this comment seems like a shitty opinion wrapped up in a greasy bit of passive-aggressive advice then lobbed through my picture window. Not going somewhere just because there are tourists there kind of negates the entire reason for travel in the first place.

* * *

None of these comments is particularly hateful in itself, but rather point to a certain attitude which indicates that Mr. X just doesn't get it. I try to make the Pop Culture Institute a welcoming place, if nothing else, and expect the same of my readers. Whatever else Mr. X's comments are, "welcoming" isn't one of them. If you must be intemperate or snide, at least be funny, well-informed, or willing to enjoin in some serious badinage.

There. Now that's done I can apologize for the clunky syntax here and go back to nursing my hangover. I got a little wild celebrating my 600th post last night, and I'm feeling it today. I'm afraid there isn't enough Calgon in the world to take me away from this headache.

Thank you for your time and patience in this matter.

MSM
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There's An Israel Day Parade?

Why was I not told about this? How do I keep missing these memos? Oh, that's right. I don't live in Manhattan.

Since "move to Manhattan" is already at the top of my To-Do list, and this year's parade is already over, I guess I've done all I can do for now.



Not that I'm, like, a Zionist or anything... Per se. It's just that Jewish guys are kinda hot.

Thanks to Joe.My.God for the 411.
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Blog Fodder: The Brain Fart

Wouldn't you know, the longer I do this the easier it gets. It also gets easier to make mistakes, like preparing posts then forgetting to publish them. It must have been all that fresh air I got today. Either that or all that lack of sleep.

Anyway, as you can tell from the tag, this is my 600th post, but as promised, the next big retrospective is scheduled for the end of June, at the 1000th post. At that time I think I'd like to clarify my aims a little better with regards to the Pop Culture Institute. As the name implies, an Institute is for study, and study, at least in terms of depth, is not something I've not done too much. Yet.

Pop culture, of course, is all about patterns. Or, if you prefer, trends. Which of those trends endures becomes history. Thus the incredibly catchy tagline you see at the top of this page.

I've tried to bridge high culture and low here, and obviously I'm having fun doing it. The minute something stops being fun, that's it for me. Unless, of course, the un-fun activity pays the rent, in which case I smile through gritted teeth and try to find the fun in it where I can.

Well, all I have to say is that my teeth are never gritted when I'm working on this. It's a blast: researching the stories, putting photos with words, laughing over mistakes, and meeting all my new commenters. Honestly, I think I've discovered what it is I want to do, and I thank each and every one of you for allowing me to experiment with it on you.

MSM
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Queen Enjoys Kentucky Derby

The Queen fulfilled her lifelong dream of watching the Kentucky Derby today, accompanied by the Duke of Edinburgh. "Queen Elizabeth is certainly the most prestigious guest we've entertained in the modern-day history of the Kentucky Derby," track president Steve Sexton said. The race was won by Street Sense, who came from next-to-last place to pass Hard Spun by two and a half lengths and claim a purse worth more than $2 million US.

Her Majesty and His Royal Highness will spend the next two days near Lexington, Kentucky, at the farm of William Farish; in addition to being a former US ambassador to the Court of St. James, Mr. Farish is a horse breeder like the Queen.

On Monday the royal couple will visit the White House, where the first white-tie event of the current administration will be held in their honour.

[S O U R C E]
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ONE IS NOT AMUSED

[Elizabeth II assumes the usual expression for chatting with Darth Cheney at Jamestown. God bless you, Ma'am.]
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Are You Enjoying America, Ma'am?

[Elizabeth II, beaming during a visit to William and Mary College in Williamsburg VA.]
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Segolene Royal Kicking Ass, Taking Names

Following a victory in last Sunday's Presidential election run-off, Segolene Royal strode into the Presidential debates and whupped some serious Sarkozy ass. Now she has "dared" France to elect a woman President. Nice... Very feisty.

I'm already seeing Juliette Binoche in the movie version.

[S O U R C E]
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Queen Tours Jamestown

The Queen made her tour of historic Olde Jamestowne accompanied by Virginia governor Timothy M. Kaine and Darth Cheney.

Which means, I guess, that Her Majesty's handbag was stuffed full of digitalis, virgin's blood, and epinephrine suppositories (or whatever it is they're using to keep that criminal alive).

She was also greeted by Sandra Day O'Connor, like the queen an equine enthusiast.

Though she made no speech, the Queen made animated remarks throughout her tour, which included an armoury and the excavation of the nearby Fort, which was thought to be lost when she last visited in 1957.

The Queen's next stop is William and Mary College.

(photo: Jason Reed/Reuters via The New York Times)
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Steinbeck Trove Uncovered

Rare and valuable manuscripts by Nobel Prize-winning writer John Steinbeck have been found in a home in the Hollywood Hills. They include an unpublished story, several letters, and a draft of Sweet Thursday, the sequel to Cannery Row.

The papers are expected to fetch upwards of half a million dollars at auction.

[S O U R C E]
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Now Showing - "Margaret Thatcher" on Codco

Codco was a seminal Canadian sketch comedy show.

This sketch features the brilliant Greg Malone as Margaret Thatcher, discussing cuts to social programs and generally poor-bashing.

Why this show isn't on DVD is beyond me. (Are you listening Salter Street Productions and CBC?)
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Queen's Address To The Virginia Assembly

Thank you for your generous welcome to Virginia. Prince Philip and I are delighted to be here in your state capital today, designed by that great Virginian, Thomas Jefferson, and so painstakingly restored over recent years.

I would like to congratulate everyone involved in this most impressive project.

As a state, and as a nation, you are still coming to terms with the dreadful events at Virginia Tech on the 16th of April. My heart goes out to the students, friends and families of all those killed, and to the many others who have been affected, some of whom I shall be meeting shortly.

On behalf of the people of the United Kingdom, I extend my deepest sympathies at this time of such grief and sorrow.

I visit the United States this week to commemorate the 400th anniversary of the landing of a small group of British citizens on a tiny island in what is now called the James River, here in Virginia.

With the benefit of hindsight, we can see that, in that event, the origins of a singular endeavor, the building of a great nation, founded on the eternal values of democracy and equality, based on the rule of law and the promotion of freedom.

But we should always be cautious of hindsight. Four hundred years ago, it was by no means preordained that this venture would succeed. Recent archaeological work has modified our understanding of the original settlement at Jamestown, about the choice of its location and the kind of people who came.

While it remains difficult to say what it was about those early years which caught that vital moment in the evolution of this great country, it must surely have had something to do with the ingenuity, the drive and the idealism of that group of adventurers who first set foot on this fertile Virginia soil, and the will of the Powhattan people to find ways to coexist.

When I visited 50 years ago we celebrated the 350th anniversary largely from the perspective of those settlers, in terms of the exploration of new worlds, the spread of values and of the English language, and the sacrifice of those early pioneers.

These remain great attributes, and we still appreciate their impact today. But 50 years on, we are now in a position to reflect more candidly on the Jamestown legacy.

Human progress rarely comes without cost. And those early years in Jamestown, when three great civilizations came together for the first time, Western European, Native American and African, released a train of events which continues to have a profound social impact, not only in the United States, but also in the United Kingdom and Europe.

Over the course of my reign, and certainly since I first visited Jamestown in 1957, my country has become a much more diverse society, just as the Commonwealth of Virginia and the whole United States of America have also undergone major social change.

The "melting pot" metaphor captures one of the great strengths of your country, and is an inspiration to others around the world, as we face the continuing social challenges ahead.

It is right that we continue to reassess the meaning of historical events in the changing context of the present, not least in this, the 200th anniversary, in the United Kingdom, of the act of parliament to abolish the trans-Atlantic slave trade.

But such reassessments should not obscure one enduring consequence of Jamestown. This 400th anniversary marks a moment to recognize the deep friendship which exists between our two countries.

Friendship is a complex concept. It means being able to debate openly, disagree on occasion, surmount both good times and bad, safe in the knowledge that the bonds that draw us together, of history, understanding and warm regard are far stronger than any temporary differences of opinion.

The people of the United Kingdom have such a relationship with the people of this great nation. It is one of the most durable international collaborations anywhere in the world, at any time in history, a friendship for which I certainly, in my lifetime, have had good cause to be thankful.

That is a lasting legacy of Jamestown that is something worth commemorating. And that is why I am pleased to be here today.
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Veto This!

Seriously. In favour of war, pollution, hate crimes, and pestilence... This is a President?

There are few public figures I've avoided blogging about in the year and a half I've been at this. He's one of them, and there's a pointed reason for that. In the same way I have refused to mention Paris Hilton, I've kept quiet on W because I pity him. But no more.

In the words of Dan Savage: impeach the motherfucker already!
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Stunning Archaeological Find In Nepal

A series of painted caves in the remote Himalayan kingdom has archaeologists scratching their heads. The caves were discovered near Lo Manthang, date from the 13th Century CE, and depict scenes from the life of the Buddha in gold paint.



[S O U R C E]
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Queen Arrives In America

I've been anticipating this Annie Leibovitz portrait of the Queen ever since I'd heard it was being taken. Not being legitimate media I was unable to receive it yesterday when it was first released, so I had to wait an extra day and snag it off Towleroad.

The usual chorus of haters lined up to denounce the picture: "It looks like something you might see in a catalogue offering the Queen herself for sale," said Henry Allen of The Washington Post, just before I soundly thrashed him with my left shoe. It was, after all, taken for Vanity Fair.

Naturally, all portraits of the Queen inspire a furious debate. The traditional ones have people looking for something more avant-garde, and the "edgy" ones (not that such a thing is possible) are usually thought to be disrespectful.

I think the picture is lovely, poignant, wistful, and painterly. Leibovitz's work has always been artful but has been known to border on the sensational, which is not something that would suit the Queen in the least. It features Her Majesty in her natural setting, and I especially love the glimpse of turbulent sky out the window. Very Old Master, that.

The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh arrive in America today for a six-day official tour to Virginia, Maryland, and Washington D.C.
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Books Wormed - "Born To Kvetch" by Michael Wex

Maybe you know that sick feeling when a book you're enjoying suddenly goes over your head. Then again, maybe you don't.

I do, and this is its cover.

Now, when it comes to linguistics, I'm not exactly cunning... Despite recognising most of the words in Born To Kvetch I'll be damned if I can figure out why the author has chosen such complicated patterns to put them in. I probably would have given up on it by now, but I'm really interested in the subject. Besides which, the parts I can understand are really good.

Alas, the further into it I read, the farther apart those bits I can understand are getting.

It's good to get your brain out of its familiar rut from time to time; if you're me, you enjoy making your brain the consistency of pizza dough on a regular basis.

I may have met my match here.
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Queen's Visit To Jamestown Imminent, Eminent

It was nearly 50 years ago Elizabeth II first visited Jamestown on the occasion of its 350th anniversary (shown above). Once again the Commonwealth of Virginia is all agog over a royal visit, this time for the 400th anniversary.

The Queen's complete schedule is available here. Her Majesty's itinerary includes the visit to Olde Jamestowne, trips to the Kentucky Derby, Goddard Space Centre, William and Mary College, and a garden party and state dinner at the White House, among others.

I really enjoyed the stories about Jamestown in the May 2007 issue of National Geographic, which can be enjoyed online here. I learned about, among other things, Columbian exchange, a concept which was completely unknown to me before I folded back that iconic yellow-bordered cover.

The Royal visit commences May 3rd and finishes on the 8th; count on the Pop Culture Institute for full coverage of the Queen's fourth official visit to the United States.
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RIP Tom Poston

Winner of three Air Medals in WWII, Tom Poston first came to the public's attention on The Tonight Show starring Steve Allen, at the dawn of television. His persona varied from bumbling to sharp-tongued but no matter the character, one thing was certain: Tom Poston could be counted on to deliver the laughs.

Our thoughts go out to his widow, Suzanne Pleshette.
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The Curse of Beltane

Thanks to a gargantuan effort at character building over the past couple of years, I have managed to reduce the days in the year in which I feel sorry for myself from all of them to about a half a dozen: New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day, Pride Day, my birthday, and May 1st. All are days when there is an extra emphasis placed on couplehood (over and above the usual).

Why May 1st, you might ask. Simply put, May 1st is Beltane, which, among other things, can be seen as a celebration of all that is lush and carnal in Nature. Certainly, the bees are shtupping the flowers, and the skies are filled with fat little birds preparing their nests. Tis a lusty time, to be sure, just not a great one to be alone.

On the human side of things, the first warm days mean that long-covered skin is gradually being uncovered. Couples wander about rapt in each other's attention in ways they don't seem to do the rest of the year. This means I spend a lot of time looking at the sidewalk, rather than be bombarded with this particular failing of mine around every corner.

Of course, Nature does provide an ample distraction. After many months of looking up at bare branches, the simple sight of leaves on the trees is spell-binding. The world, in a lot of ways, seems better at this time of year. All the seasons have their charms, but the other three seem to have to try to be as charming as spring is naturally.

So why a curse? Surely that's a harsh word to use against a time of year that clearly has me enamoured. Well, for an earthy person such as me, the sensory overload is a real test of character. I enjoy the aesthetics of the season - alone - and I revel in the rest of its sensations, reminding myself over and over that the only thing life guarantees us is ourselves.

As I've said, it's a momentary thing, a couple of days' melancholy in the midst of supernatural beauty, which, unlike the other days I mentioned, provides considerable comfort of its own. I mean, consider Valentine's Day: you feel like crap, and besides that, it's February. Throw in math and you have my idea of Hell.

Every year I believe in the Curse of Beltane less, and every year it weakens. It's no coincidence that every year, I believe in myself more, and surely that has something to do with it. It's all a bit moot, given that I never meet anyone with even the potential for reciprocal attraction; it's just good to vent any excess neurosis from time to time, so why not today?
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Britain Offering Terrorists Plum Hostage

I can believe that Prince Harry will be shipped out to Iraq - I don't like it, but anyone who joins the Army in a time of war can reasonably expect to be shipped anywhere, even a war zone such as Iraq or Afghanistan.

What I cannot believe is that a professional army would deploy any soldier whose presence is likely to be distracting, as well as one who's been targeted for capture by Shi'ite militia as Prince Harry. I cannot help but wonder at what's really behind this.

You've taken the macho shit a little too far when you'd risk a constitutional crisis and the lives of untold troops to make a point. Stupid war...
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Join The Campaign For "Little Britain" In NYC

Jolly good! Check out the campaign for a "Little Britain" in the Big Apple. One thing is for sure: Greenwich Village is one village where you'll never be the only gay.
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Michael's Day Out: New Westminster & Bear Creek Park

All week the city had been doused in the most torrential of rains. Even for a place where it rains as much as it does in Vancouver it was bad - a steady, heavy pelting of rain, the kind of rain that soaks you to the soul. It was build a boat and find pairs of animals time, people. Seriously.

Despite this, I had every intention of going out to visit my new friend John in the suburbs on Sunday to take pictures, rain or shine. Imagine my surprise when I awoke Saturday to a gorgeous blast of sunshine; when the same sunshine prevailed on Sunday it wasn't merely double the pleasure, it was an exponential thing. I don't know the math, but you get my meaning.



I took the above photo of Chee-chee-yoh-hee (The Lions) from the platform of the Broadway SkyTrain station, during a breather from the crushing bus ride there and the crushing SkyTrain ride to New Westminster. Honestly, 2PM on a Sunday and it was worse than a Friday rush hour. Translink sucks, and not in the good way; in defiance of the laws of physics, it also blows, in a manner which is equally unsatisfactory.



I can't resist a statue, in this case one of Matthew Baillie Begbie, first Chief Justice of British Columbia. It's an appropriate choice, as well, as New Westminster is gradually emerging from a period of lawlessness and urban decay that is unworthy of the province's first city.



Despite the number of clearly troubled people shambling about on the streets, and the preponderance of decayed brick buildings on Columbia Street (where the city's two SkyTrain stations are), New Westminster is truly undergoing a Gastown/Yaletown kind of gentrification. I'd say it's at the mid-point; there is much left to be done, but much has been done already.

The decay is in the downtown area only, though. The residential area, which I will be photographing later in the summer, is a sumptuous fantasy of Victorian/Edwardian homes and gardening unrivalled in the Lower Mainland. If I had to live anywhere in the region outside of Vancouver, I would live in New Westminster, if only to satisfy my fetish for architecture.



I met John in New West, and after a fortifying coffee we made our way over the Fraser River into Surrey, to Bear Creek Park. I figured the previous week's rain would leave the place glowingly green and I was right. The park was also very busy, but large enough that the crowds there never seemed overwhelming. The park was relatively unscathed by this winter's storms.



While there, John and I enjoyed the opportunity to photograph many plants, from towering trees to tiny flowers...



I can never resist the opportunity to photograph a squirrel, especially not a gray. This one posed beautifully, and later came to within a metre of me where I'd crouched to take this picture. Since I didn't have any food, and wouldn't feed a wild animal anyway, it soon scampered off.



Not only did I get my second chance to photograph a bald eagle in as many months, this particular beauty was calling a considerable amount, which is a thrilling sound, even if it's a freaky kind of thrill. Once heard, the sound never leaves you. It would perch here, near its nest, call out a half dozen times, make a dozen circles in the air, then repeat; an awesome sight.



We made another bird friend that day too, a species I've never photographed because I've never seen one before. If I had to guess, I'd say it was a male western Rufous-sided Towhee. I took so many pictures of him, I'm sure he's still bragging about it to his buddies. Because he was likely guarding a nearby nest, John and I were able to get closer than we usually would.



Finally, the light began to fail, and a near-full new moon rose. John and I retired to the nearest Tim Horton's so I could eat and we could review our afternoon's efforts. He's new to digital photography, and doesn't like the digital camera he has, but he was able nonetheless to get some amazing pictures despite the frustration. We have a similar eye when it comes to work, so we complemented each other well on what was our first expedition.

All in all, it was a productive and wonderful day. We had some discussion about next week's excursion, and seemed to settle on Gastown.

So we shall see...
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BOY OH BOY

Troubled pop star Boy George has been arrested - again - this time on charges of false imprisonment, sexually harassing and assaulting a male escort he'd hired as a model.

Now, admittedly, I'm no expert in S&M. Okay, I've got the M part down, but the S... Not so much.

Anyway, even I know the secret is in consensuality and negotiation. Just because you hire a guy for sex doesn't mean he's up for this kind of thing. I suppose my unenlightened attitude means I'll be learning a thing or two about the S now...

Just in case, my safe word is 'Stephen Harper'.

[S O U R C E]
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Citygate Cache Uncovered

Vancouver police uncovered an "extraordinary" cache of weapons and materials used in the making of explosives in a condo at Citygate (shown above) in Vancouver this weekend. Police, inexplicably, say the find is neither gang- nor terrorist-related.

Okay...

[S O U R C E]
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The Son Also Rises

Justin Trudeau, eldest son of former Prime Minister Pierre Elliott Trudeau, has been nominated to represent the Liberals in the Montreal riding of Papineau. It was a slim victory - 54% - and hard fought.

There are no words to describe how good this news is; not even I could hyperbolise it.

[S O U R C E]
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Now Showing - David Campbell's "Buck Man Knows"

It's been my pleasure these past few weeks to feature the music and videos of David Campbell. Here, then, is another one.
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Project Civil City: An Update

Once again, I would encourage any of you Vancouverites out there who might be free on Tuesday night to head out to the Main Library downtown and attend this forum sponsored by Project Civil City.

I was recently contacted by one of the organisers, who disabused some of the implications I or my commenters might have made, namely that the City of Vancouver was in any way involved in the meeting or the organisation sponsoring it. Googling "Project Civil City" leads first to the City's website, which may have led to some of this confusion. That and the fact that the Mayor's name is in great big letters at the top of the front page.

The clarification, left as a comment on the post linked below, says:

Hi there,

Nice to see one of our posters on your blog!

Just wanted to clarify that the civilcity.ca webpage and the debate session have been set up by the Vancouver Public Space Network... which is a volunteer group. We're not affiliated with the City of Vancouver. To the best of my knowledge, the City doesn't have a web-page on civil city.

[Blogmaster's Note: It's a News Release.]

Our intent in taking a more neutral position on this debate was to allow some of the other key players in the discussion have their say without biasing the debate process upfront.

Thanks for the comments on the graphic sensibilities too… like everything else we do, it was made possible through lots of volunteer time and effort. If you’d be interested in helping on public space related projects such as this feel free to drop us a line: info@vancouverpublicspace.ca.

Best,

Andrew P. (VPSN)

Honestly, I wish I could attend, and will be doing my best to send someone in my place, preferably someone with a tape recorder, so I can hear for myself what's being said, unfiltered by some intermediary and their own opinions. Even the most trusted source in this case is still a second-hand one. Naturally, I will be conducting further research into this matter.

Though the poster states that Micheal Vonn of the BC Civil Liberties Union will be a panelist, I am still uncertain to what extent the right will try to grab control of Project Civil City in its ongoing attempt to govern behaviour, rather than seeking to instil civility on a voluntary basis. Vancouver Public Space Network has a very thorough website, worth exploring, which looks initially promising.

A more civil city is an admirable aim, and I'm looking forward to doing my part. Why, just the other day I was almost run over, and I never even flipped the driver the bird or anything.

Previously:

Project Civil City: Good Idea or Totally Fucking Dumb?
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Hating on Harper (And Loving It)

It's not in my Nature to agree with Toronto, but whenever they agree with me, I'll happily go along with it.

I have no idea what encouraged the Toronto Star's Scott Reid to sharpen his knife in this case, but I must say that his effort to plunge it in are well-received here.

I have always said that Stephen Harper was a tyrant; I have been patronised and mocked for that position. Now, it seems, others are waking up to that fact.

[S O U R C E]
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Quake Rattles UK

An earthquake registering 4.7 on the Richter scale rumbled through southwestern England, toppling chimneys and shaking nerves, but causing no serious injury or death.


[S O U R C E]
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Jack Valenti's Dead

As evidenced by the title of this post, I refuse to let death turn me into a hypocrite. Especially not someone else's.

Jack Valenti brought censorship to the mainstream. While the ratings system he pioneered through the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) undoubtedly made it clearer what sort of content one could expect on the way in to the multiplex, it did so in a reductive way, by edict of a committee whose decisions were anything but transparent. As well, the process by which those ratings were assigned was fraught with corruption.

The MPAA's handling of sexual content versus violent content was responsible for two decades of continued homophobia in Hollywood. In that time, any depiction of two men kissing would earn an automatic R, whereas you could shoot the two men and still have a PG.
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What Is A Boy To Do?

This past month, wherever I've gone, I've been absolutely beset by people enquiring after the state of my writing.

I'm not exaggerating when I say it's been dozens. (Well, a dozen, but still...) I point out to them that I'm writing a blog, which takes considerable time and energy. At which point most of them act like they've never heard of blogs, the Internet, or personal computers.

What they really want to know is: am I still writing fiction? Ah, fiction... The last bastion of the masochist. First, last, best...

I then explain to them (v e r y s l o w l y) that I sometimes write as many as a thousand words a day on my blog, and it takes just hours to find the right photos and stuff to go with each post, especially since the hamster that runs my processor chip recently took up smoking. I then do whatever I have to to change the subject, lest I jinx it for myself and everybody.

Yes, I have been writing fiction. No, I don't hold out any hope it'll ever see the light of day. Yes, it is fucking brilliant, but then it would be coming from me. This is the point where the Ego Monster appears, and I have to catch it, kill it, skin it, then prepare and enjoy a lovely Ego Monster stew for lunch. For the record, it tastes nothing like chicken.

What most of my fans who clamour for my glamour fail to understand is that a) there are only 24 hours in a day, b) as I am basically indolent I insist on wasting at least six of them on sleep, c) nine or ten get wasted on work and a couple more on things like being neurotic about my appearance, so then d) why would I spend the rest typing away at something that'll never get published when I could be spending the time on something that is being published, namely THIS BLOG!

Sorry for yelling; it's not even angry yelling, it's funny yelling, like Kirstie Alley. (Funny, but from an angry place.)

I assure you, I am not being negative in this, but I do not have the credentials to be a novelist, period. To be a blogger you don't need credentials, just a computer and an attitude, and what I lack in computer (lovely as it is) I more than make up for in attitude. Following the path of least resistance, I find myself here, being irresistible. ; )

Nevertheless, I have a planet's worth of characters inside me, and if I don't write them out they take over, so I write.

Hopefully, by the time I can afford to go to university and get my degree so that a publisher or an agent will deign to talk to me, I will have many such novels waiting in the wings to support me in my dotage; my dotage being that time of my life when, having written several novels, I'm unfit for any other work, and mostly suited to drooling in the corner.

Ah... Those'll be the days.
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Just Because - "Mahna Mahna" by Jim Henson's Muppets

I almost don't need any text to accompany this classic bit of Muppets mania from the first episode of "The Muppet Show" in 1975.
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Seattle Pride Saved!

Yay! Now if only my company can save me a couple of days off to attend it, I plan to be there to rock the thing.
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Programming Suggestion: "Celebrity Grudge Match"

It's the Feud That Refuses To Die...



So why not turn it into a game show?

Hosted by Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell, each episode features a famously squabbling pair of celebrities who will once and for all have it out on national TV.

See the depravity! Hear the shocking language! Enjoy the degradation!

Paris vs. Lindsay! Kim vs. Alec! Britney vs. Her Career!

Only on Fox!
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